Movie Review: Red Sonja (1985)

This week, I wanted to give a shout out to a fun, if flawed, Swords & Sorcery romp that I watched many times on VHS when I was younger, "Red Sonja":

In this film, our titular character (played by newcomer Brigitte Nielsen) out is out to stop evil Queen Gedren (played by Sandahl Bergman), before the latter uses a powerful artifact of dark sorcery to destroy the world by flood and earthquake.  Sonja and Gedren have history: Sonja rejected Gedren's advances, so the Queen had Sonja raped and most of her family murdered.

Years later, after a magical spirit gives Sonja great sword fighting skills by and she receives training from a sword master to hone those skills, she finds that Gedren has also murdered her sister, a priestess guarding the Talisman (the aforementioned artifact of dark sorcery), whilst stealing the Talisman.  So, the Red One sets out to seek bloody vengeance (and also to save the world).

Along the way, she forms a motley party of adventurers (including Arnold Schwarzenegger playing a Conan the Barbarian expy), carves up anyone who stands in her way, and learns that not all men are evil.

This film has many, many drawbacks: Richard Fleischer, who directed "Conan the Destroyer" (1984), also helms this flick and "Red Sonja" shares many of the same problems, such as the dull direction, the significant departure from the dark, brooding, serious style of adult fantasy of "Conan the Barbarian" (1982), the weak story and lack of tension, the uninspired soundtrack, the cheap laughs, etc.

There is also plenty of bad acting and dialogue, such as this classic line:

Gedren... Where are youuuu?

Sandahl Bergman, who was supposed to be Sonja but declined, does a decent job of chewing scenery as the villain but Arnold mostly sleepwalks through completing his contractual obligations.

Speaking of which, as the third in Arnold's barbarian trilogy, this film was meant to be another Conan film but the producers ran into problems when they lost the rights to that character.  So, instead, they decided to change the main character.  Based on the character Red Sonya of Rogatino, Robert E. Howard's short story "The Shadow of the Vulture" (1934), Red Sonja is a swashbucking warrior woman popularized by Marvel Comics and set in R. E. Howard's Hyborian Age (also home to Conan the Barbarian).

Anyway, IMHO, "Red Sonja" is still fun if you take it for what it is, a lean 80s Action flick with 65 on screen murders, including the decapitation of the hapless sorcerer and one dude getting crushed to death.  The action choreography is mostly decent to good and the costume and production design (except for the Killing Machine, which was laughable even in the '80s) are excellent.

Indeed, I actually rate "Red Sonja" above "Conan the Destroyer," which I found to be rather dull.    "Red Sonja" is faster paced and filled with more action.  Queen Gedren is batshit insane and is at least funnier than the evil queen in "Conan the Destroyer".  And the kid sidekick (Prince Tarn) is way less annoying than Malak the Thief, actually has a character arc and proves to eventually be brave and useful.

Also, there's nothing really silly in "Red Sonja" on par with Zula (played by Grace Jones) wearing a tail or Andre the Giant in a rubber monster costume.

So, if you have some spare time and you're a fan of Swords & Sorcery, you could definitely do worse than spend 90 minutes back in the days of yore, when women were women and men mostly met the business end of Red Sonja's blade!